Get your tissues ready ~ tears streamed down my leechie face as i read the following posting from a CNA forummer!
"4 years ago, an accident took my beloved away and very often I wonder, how does my wife, who is now in the heavenly realm, feel right now? She must be> feeling extremely sad for leaving a husband who is incapable to taking care of the house and the kid. 'cos that is the exact feeling that I have, as I feel that I have fail to provide for the physical and emotional needs of my> kid, and failed to be the dad and mum for my kid.
There was one particular day, when i had an emergency at work. Hence, I had to leave home whilst my child was still sleeping. So thinking that > there> was still rice leftovers, I hastily cooked an egg and left after > informing> my sleepy child.
With the double roles, I am often exhausted at work as well as > when I am> home.. So after a long day, I came home, totally drained of all > energy. So> with just a brief hug and kiss for my child, I went straight into > the room,> skipping dinner. However, when I jumped into my bed with intention > of just> having a well-deserved sleep, all i heard and felt was broken > porcelain and> warm liquid! I flipped open my blanket, and there lies the source > of the> 'problem'.... a broken bowl with instant noodles and a mess on the > bedsheet> and blanket!
Boy, was I mad! I was so furious that I took a clothes hanger, > charged> straight at my child who was happily playing with his toy, and > give him a> good spanking! He merely cried but not asking for mercy, except a > short> explanation:
"Dad, I was hungry and there wasnt anymore leftover rice. But you > were> not back yet, hence I wanted to cook some instant noodles. But i > remembered> you reminding me not to touch or use the gas stove without any > adults around,> hence i turn on the shower and used the hot water from the > bathroom to cook> the noodles. One is for you and the other is for me.> However, I was afraid> that the noodles will turn cold, so I hid it under the blanket to > keep it> warm till u return. But I forgot to remind you 'cos I was playing > with my> toys...I am sorry Dad...
At that moment, tears were starting to run down my cheeks...but I > didn't> want my son to see his dad crying...so I dashed into the bathroom > and cried> with the showerhead on to mask my cries....
After that episode, I went towards my son to give him a tight hug > and> applied medication on him, while coaxing him to sleep.> Then, it was time to> clear up the mess on the bed. When everything was done and well > past> midnight, I passed my son's room, and saw that he was still > crying, not> from the pain on his little buttock, but from looking at the > photograph of> his beloved mummy....
A year has passed since the episode, I have tried, in this period, > to focus> on giving him both the love of his dad and mum, and to attend to > most of> his needs. And soon, he is turning seven, and will be graduating > from> kindergarten. Fortunately, the incident did not leave a lasting > impression> on his childhood memories and he is still happily growing up.
However, not so long ago, I hit my boy again, with much regrets. > This time,> his kindergarten teacher called, informing me of my son's absence > from> school. I took off early from work and went home, expecting him to > explain.> But he wasnt to be found, so I went around our house, calling out > his name> and eventually found him outside a stationery shop, happily > playing> computer games. I was fuming, brought him home and whack the hell > out of> him. He did not retaliate, except to say, 'I am sorry, Dad'. But > after much> probing, I realized that it was a 'Talent Show'> organized by his school and> the invite is for every student's mummy and> that was the reason for his absence as he has no mummy.....
Few days after the caning, my son came home to tell me, the > kindergarten> has recently taught him how to read and write. Since then, he has > kept to> himself and stayed in his room to practise his writing, which I am > sure,> would make my wife proud, if she was still around.> 'cos he makes me proud> too!
Time passes by very quickly, and soon another year has passed. > It's winter,> and its Christmas time. Everywhere the christmas spirit is in > every> passer-by...xmas carols and frantic shoppers....but alas, my son > got into> another trouble. When I was about to knock off from the day's > work, the> post office called. Due to the peak season, the post master was > also on an> edgy mood. He called to tell me that my son has attempted to post > several> letters with no addressee. Although I did make a promise never to > hit my> son again, I couldn't help but to hit him as I feel that this > child of mine> is really beyond control. Once again, as before, he apologized, ' > I'm> sorry, Dad' and no additional reason to explain. I pushed him > towards a> corner, went to the post office to collect the letters with no > addressee> and came home, and angrily questioned my son on his prank, during > this time> of the year.> > > > His answer, amidst his sobbing, was : The letters were for Mummy.
My eyes grew teary, but I tried to control my emotions and > continued to ask> him: " But why did you post so many letters, at one time?" My> son's reply was: " I have been writing to mummy for a long time, > but> each time I reach out for the post box, it was too high for me, > hence I was> not able to post the letters. But recently, when I went back to > the> postbox, I could reach it and I sent it all at once..."
After hearing this, I was lost. Lost at not knowing what to do, > what to> say....> > > > I told my son, " Son, mummy is in the heavenly kingdom, so in > future,> if you have anything to tell her, just burn the letter and it will > reach> mummy. My son, on hearing this, was much pacified and calm, and > soon after,> he was sleeping soundly. On promising that I will burn the letters > on his> behalf, I brought the letters outside, but couldnt help opening > one of the letter before they turned to ash.> > > > > > > > And one of the letters broke my heart....
Dear Mummy,> > > > I miss you so much! Today, there was a> 'Talent Show' in school, and> the school invited all mothers for the show. But you are not > around, so I> did not want to participate as well. I did not tell Dad about it > as I was> afraid that Dad would start to cry and miss you all over again. > Dad went> around looking for me, but in order to hide my sadness, I sat in > front of> the computer and started playing games at one of the shops. Dad > was> furious, and he couldnt help it but scolded and hit me, but I did > not tell> him the real reason. Mummy, everyday I see Dad missing you and > whenever he> think of you, he is so sad and often hide and cry in his room. I> think we both miss you very very much. Too much for our own good I > think.> But Mummy, I am starting to forget your face. Can you please > appear in my> dreams so that I can see your face and remember you? I heard that > if you> fall asleep with the photograph of the person whom you miss, you > will see> the person in your dreams. But mummy, why havent you appear?
After reading the letter, I cant stop sobbing. 'cos I can never > replace the> irreplaceable gap left behind by my wife.....
For the females with children:> > > > Don't do so much overtime. If you cannot finish the work, it must > be some> kind of problems within the company, and it is not your sole > problem.> Feedback to your boss. Endless overtime may not necessary be the > answer to> the problem. Take> care of your health so that you can treasure and take care of your > little> precious.
For the married men:> > > > Drink less, smoke less, cos nothing can replace your good health, > not even> business nor clients.> > > > Try thinking this way, are you able to work till your clients are > totally> dependent on you? or your boss is totally dependent on you? In > this> society, no one is indispensable. > > > > Take care of your health, so that you can take care of your little > precious> and your loved ones.
For those singles out there:> > > > Beauty lies in loving yourself first."
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Emo...haiz -.-"
Need miracles in my life! o.O
Drinking n driving don't mix! o.O"
A sneak preview of Universal Studios Sentosa ;p
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